The Groomsman's Affairs Ch. 09-10
So, we made sure to leave Becca a great tip ... and to let Wayne be the one to have the first-time experience of actually giving it to her. Her eyes really bugged as she saw it, too. A twenty percent or twenty-five percent tip was one thing, but a FIFTY PERCENT TIP? Hot damn, she was impressed by it. He was definitely her hero by now, and luckily for him, she didn't know his horrible past with waitstaff. Not yet. There were still restaurants that all but banned him for life for past awful conduct.
"Wow, that feels good! I can't believe what a difference ... most waiters avoid me like the plague and I swear that sometimes, cooks have spat in my food and drink. I just couldn't prove it. This is a helluva good feeling! And I got at least a date out of it. A first date, no less. I'll just have to go to a place where my reputation isn't trash. Getting rid of the stench of being a bad tipper will take a while, won't it?" Wayne had the decency to look embarrassed at his past behavior.
"You were running out of places to go by yourself and started to only go in groups, weren't you?" I teased him.
"Yeah, about like that ... and going out of town, too. That gets to be pricier than the tips once gasoline is factored in, you know. What Dad likes to call petrol sometimes, because Grandpa used to call it that," Wayne alluded to his family's Anglophile ways brought over from Hong Kong.
"And it spreads your ill repute even further. Yeah, my brother, we're gonna have to work on your rehabilitation, but it can be done," Cassidy told him now.
"So it seems, but it's a worthy cause," Sofia added.
"Indeed it is," Vicky declared.
"Very much so," Kara chimed in now.
"I'm a lot prouder of you now, son. You're becoming a man at last. Men aren't supposed to be that hung up on status. That's a preppy, not a real bloke. Someday, and hopefully soon, I'll send you a copy of a verse by Rudyard Kipling about maturation and manhood. I should have taught it to you years ago. It's very sage wisdom in that poem.
"Especially the line that reads, 'and walk with kings, nor lose the common touch.' There's more to life than status. I wish that I had taught you better about that, but at last you're learning it, anyway," Mike assured Wayne with a bear hug.
"Well, now that you're less hung up on that, you can date a real catch like Becca. Just bear in mind that she's eight years your senior, so that could lead to issues. And you would be an instant dad ... but I think that you can handle that. You'll be surprised at how easy it can be to love someone who isn't flesh and blood," Mom kissed Wayne on the cheek now as we left the diner.
"So ... how are we gonna make this work with the whole ... five-way relationship dynamic you have? Assuming that you five make it last ... which I actually think more possible than others would believe. You always had ... that very affectionate side to you. I just didn't know how far it would take you. Also, what will you do about Sofia's pregnancy?" Mom wondered now in the van.
"Well, here's a thought. I would marry Sofia, since that's legal. I would claim paternity by virtue of default, as the husband of the baby's mother. No one else needs to even know that it's not mine. That's different from being tricked into this, which is paternity fraud. I am knowingly claiming another dude's brat because I want to do so. As for the others, they can do what they want ... I just want to be with them. All four of them," I explained with a wink for each of my ladies.
"Yeah, we stole his heart! Let's just not rush into anything yet ... time enough for that. All I know is that I adore my twin and my sisters ... and to me, Sofia's gonna be my sister-in-law, so that makes her my sister, too. We belong together. Period. That's just how it has to be. I'm never going to leave my brother's bed. Ever. Never again. Four years of him away in the Army were Hell on Earth for me. It was torture!" Vicky confessed the sheer intensity of her love for me.
"So ... we need to go ahead and put you in the same bedroom, don't we? What about you, Sofia? Would you like to move in with him and share his bed sooner rather than later? What about Kara and Cassidy ... how do we make this work? A new place to live ... where the five of you live together? What about when you visit a place together?" Mom wondered openly.
"Well, I would like to go in on a place together, if possible," Kara proposed.
"Me, too, but for now, yes, if I could move in with you guys ... and share his bed, that would rock!" Sofia beamed now.
"And I'm totally cool with sharing a place. Nothing wrong with home, but well ... we ladies need a kitchen of our own, even if we have to share it with each other. Just know that this will always be home to me ... and you will always be Mom to me. I love you a lot ... Mom," Cassidy reassured Mom as she kissed her cheek.
"I love you, too, honey. I love all of my kids ... okay?" Mom told her with a very warm hug.
"You've become a lot warmer and nicer over the years, not that you were cold in the past, of course. Just sweeter these days," I noticed Mom's increasing kindness, though she was never a meanie.
"Like you, I've mellowed out a bit. More than a little, in fact. I used to be a bitch at times to your father, though he gave as good as he got. We both cheated, though neither of us do that anymore. I have it on good authority from Cheyenne that he has never cheated on her, not even once. I never cheated again after the divorce. I just didn't do it.
"And I've learned recently that some of my more ... questionable acts, like criticizing husbands in front of others ... may not have been wise. So I'm working on that. Little tip, guys. If you want to be happy together, be honest and blunt in private ... but be a united front in public. Be a time. Have each other's back, against everyone else and the world. That's just how it has to be," Mom counseled us ... great advice, in fact.
But that was enough conversation for now, as we had returned to Mom's house ... and we had a lot to do ... from more sex ... to setting up dinner and movie for later. I also had a text from Dad and I made sure to answer that. We planned to spend time with Cheyenne and him closer to the wedding, of course. It would just have to wait until after Mother's Day.
Chapter 10
"So, Dad, what's going on?" I asked my father after calling in response to his text.
"A few things at once, actually. One of which involves Mike, if he's cool with it. First things first. Cheyenne ... wants to sign a prenup. Yeah, it was HER idea, strangely enough. I'm really not worried, as most of my assets are protected, but to her, it's the principle of the matter to get all of the property issues settled in advance.
"She doesn't plan to divorce me, of course, but the odds are 50/50 for first marriages and even worse for second ones, as you know. I'd need Mike to draw one up with reasonable haste ... and yet attention to detail, to protect Cheyenne's interests as well as mine. So there's that. She's got it in her head that she needs to prove that not all women are gold-diggers, hypergamous ways notwithstanding. She thinks that prenups should be standard for marriage in the future to save a lot of court costs, lawyer fees. She might have a point there.
"The next thing is that ... your Uncle Gavin can't serve as best man after all. He's been ... indicted. Yep. For securities fraud, insider trading, perjury, etc. The grand jury convened and produced an indictment ... something that he never mentioned was even a risk before. This also means that he has to step down as Executive Vice-President of Grant Limited. Yes, I had to fire my own damn brother for cause! It was rough! I'm pissed-off!
"This is very short notice, but Uncle Sam is done with you ... so how about filling in both spots, son? Don't worry ... if you start to fuck up, I'll tell you, but the bar is very low right now. And we need a clean slate to repair our public image, to protect it from the vultures and such. I know that you've distanced yourself from the family in recent years, but this is your old man asking you ... and well, there ... are some perks, you know. As there are with being my best man, of course," Dad urged me now.
"Well, I ... I'm engaged, Dad ... so, yeah, I could use the job. Especially as my fiancee is a pregnant movie usher from Bulgaria. So ... yeah, I'll take it ... on ONE condition," I insisted.
"What's that?" Dad wondered, probably a bit confused.
"One of my first acts is to set up a gym in the firm. We'll find space for it, trust me. And part of my duties, separate from the others and it won't compromise them, will be to train and instruct any staff who voluntarily apply for membership. I want to apply some of the techniques that work in some Asian businesses, for instance. A gym, eventually a spa, a nursery, benefits, perks, and amenities like that. A more holistic approach to management in some ways. Improving the body can also help improve the mind ... and boost morale," I proposed.
"Well, it would be excellent PR and would aid our lagging office morale, no doubt of that. This is going to be your business, your company, someday. I'm planning to leave it to you. I hope that you want to save it for you and your children. The big house, with the estate, that sort of thing, that I'm gonna leave to Vicky. She could use that more than the firm.
"And I'm leaving all of my cars and my RV to Cheyenne and Kara, but don't tell them that. I think that's only fair. The bed and breakfast I'm leaving to Arnie. He needs something to occupy him when he gets back from the Peace Corps for good," Dad continued, much to my surprise.
"The Whaler ... on Nantucket? That bed and breakfast? He's gonna kiss you, Dad, though I'd say hopefully not with tongue! His mother wouldn't appreciate that, nor would his boyfriend, for that matter, if he has one. Unless they have an open/poly deal, that is. But seriously, he'll be over the moon about The Whaler.
"How is everything else? I've meant to talk to you, but with everything leading up to Mother's Day, you know that is ... and settling in ... and resolving some family drama at Mom's place, of course. Wayne dumped his shiny new girlfriend pretty fast, I might add ... I think that he's sweet on a waitress from brunch today. At the Omeleteer, in fact. That nice breakfast diner. That's the one. Her name's Becca. I think that his taste in women is ... how shall I put it, starting to improve a bit," I briefed my father a bit now.
"Yeah, I figured that would happen. Whatever my beefs with Mike Chung, he's not a bad man. He has mostly good morals, ethics, etc. I've become convinced that he never slept with your mother while he represented her in court. And I don't think that he's cheated on her, not to my knowledge, which puts him over me, though well ... you know the backstory with all of the affairs, hers and mine.
"So, yeah, I kinda thought that, sooner or later, once he kicked back a bit more and spent more time with Wayne, Mike would be able to encourage a better set of values. And your mother is always a wonderful woman ... it's been hard to find anyone close to being in her league, let alone her equal, in spite of her adultery. She has flaws, true, but so do I. But the only women that I've known who are in the same ballpark have been Patty and Cheyenne.
"No, I wouldn't count Wendy at all. I found out later that she cheated on me ... a LOT! But it wasn't just that. She was a vain, conceited, narcissistic person with a real sense of entitlement. Patty's close, but not quite there. She still prizes the church's standards over developing a moral code of her own.
"I decided, long ago, that my own code matters more than what any church would teach you. A church can only give you the broad guidelines. The hard and fast rules you have to determine for yourself. And it can best be summed up in the Golden Rule, which is universal and is about empathy more than anything else. Don't do to others what you'd hate done to you.
"That includes lying to others, saying hurtful things, bashing your partner in front of others, cheating on your SO, that kind of thing. That's the best of Christianity ... living like Christ. Doing what he taught ... treat others as they should treat you. Cheyenne is the first person after your mother that I've dated who really shares that set of values, of ethics," Dad stopped for a second, probably to light a cigar.
"And what are your thoughts on ... open relationships?" I broached the subject.
"If that's your cup of tea, son, just be sure that everyone involved is aware and agrees freely to it. I tried it, but it didn't work because your mother wasn't into it, okay? That kinda thing, well it happens. I stupidly cheated out of annoyance and frustration with your mother about that, but that's not the same thing. That's not swinging. That's cheating. And it's wrong. Period.
"If you're unhappy, just leave. Don't cheat. That's what I did when I realized how wrong my cheating was. And your mother's, of course. I waited until you kids were of age, per my pact with your mother, but that's what I did in the end. After we tried counseling and other things that didn't pan out. We tried a lot of different things, but it just wasn't working out, for the record.
"Cheyenne doesn't care for the idea of swinging or open marriage or whatever, either, but I'm a little older, anyway. My wandering eye doesn't turn me into a walking boner, you know. I can keep it in my pants for her. She does her best to keep me happy, anyway, and not give me any reason to be tempted. Her late husband killed himself, you know, and she's terrified that it could happen again, along with me leaving her or cheating on her, etc. Once as a widow was enough for her.
"In fact, we've done premarital counseling, with Reverend Edward T. Allen, the rector, in case you wondered. Since we go to the same parish, it made sense. He's a fairly middle-of-the-road Episcopal priest, of course. He doesn't sweat the 'living in sin' too much, though he'd rather that we were wed first. He doesn't get political, but he does ask that people live their faith through empathy, charity, and other acts of grace. Oddly enough, we went to Groton together," Dad spelled out a bit more.
"But I must warn you that Kara is one of the ... ladies in question. How would Cheyenne take that news?" I stipulated.
"And she knows about it, right?" Dad asked me.
"Yes, and so do the other three ... Sofia, Cassidy ... and Vicky," I finally confessed.
"Vicky, your twin sister ... that Vicky? Cassidy, your stepsister ... wow! And Sofia, that's the exchange student, the pregnant one from Bulgaria? Is the baby yours? Wow, that is a bit of a shocker!" Dad exclaimed.
"Yes, but well ... we kinda fell into it over the weekend, you could say. It wasn't planned. And no, the baby that Sofia carries is definitely not mine. It's her ex's, but he's no longer in the picture. At least I know that going in ... and I am voluntarily claiming the child, anyway. As part of our open or poly marriage, you see. The sisters ... they sort of had a pact to ... well, you know," I stalled a bit.
"To date you together ... yeah, that sounds like something that Vicky would do. She's a free spirit, a bit of a hippie chick, flower child type ... and so anything like 'free love' and permissive sexual and romantic attitudes would appeal to her. Plus, she's always been sweet on you. I've often wondered how far, especially after she blocked the Groton thing. Now I know.
"Well, son, it's your life, and if you end up in Hell, I'll pray for you, but in the meantime, I'm going to assume that Bishop Spong was right and there is no Hell. I don't expect others to share all of my values, as I said. You gotta have your own moral code. The church's canon and morals and such ... again, guidelines, not ironclad laws.
"I would only caution you not to get Vicky pregnant. Too much risk of birth defects that way. Maybe focus the impregnation thing on the other three ... and let Vicky find a different father, or at least sperm donor, for her children. I should have seen this coming ... but it changes nothing, at least for me. I make no promises for Cheyenne. She used to be Catholic and only left because the priest told her that her late husband, Connor, went to Hell after the suicide.
"As I recall, she told the priest, 'No, he was already in Hell, and we failed to get him out of it.' Reverend Allen agreed with her on that, Father Brian, not so much. She still feels a lot of guilt over the death of Connor, you see. She's working through that, but part of her therapy is to really put me first as much as she can ... except for the sharing part. To her credit, she is every bit as faithful as she asks me to be. I'm sure of that.
"So, anyway, enough TMI. Just be good to the girls and don't let them treat you shabbily, either. Respect your ladies ... and also respect yourself. Set reasonable boundaries. And follow the ones that they set that work for them and make sense to you. Is Vicky still planning to be a chef, by the way?" Dad paused to get another drag.
"As far as I know, yes. Want to put her in charge of the company cafeteria when she finishes culinary school? It wouldn't be the worst idea in the world. She just needs plenty of training and between the school and Mom ... and probably Cheyenne, too, among others, well, you get the idea. Want to pick us up after Mother's Day, say Monday evening or Tuesday morning?" I asked Dad, not wishing to cut Mom's time short, but not wanting to deprive him, either.
"Let's make it Tuesday morning ... I'm a lark, not a night owl. It's never good work habits to be nocturnal, you know. I'd like to take you on a tour of the home office, anyway. Give you an idea of where you'd work and let the staff meet you low-key first before any office meetings. I think that it will reassure them that the firm's gonna stay in good hands. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go ... Cheyenne's dropping a very strong hint ... along with her chemise," Dad chuckled.
"Well, that's another cigarette sure to be lit, if not more, in the next two to three hours," I teased him as I hung up...
I then really, really tried to put the idea of Dad fucking Cheyenne out of my mind ... both because the image of Dad was a turn-off ... and because Cheyenne was a stunning beauty in her own right. My joke was just a defense mechanism against both my disgust at the idea of Dad's sex life ... and my attraction to Kara's lovely mother. Yeah, that apple never fell far from that tree, did it? The beauty ran on the Pequot Indian side of her ancestry, if nothing else.
Yeah, well, there's no cause for envy, is there, Vic? He got the mama ... you got the daughter. You both came out of this doing pretty damn well. The same principle applied to Dad and my stepmother as did to Mom and Mike. The news that they were still getting laid was very good indeed. While sex isn't the sole pillar of marriage and relationships, it's absolutely one of the four. Kill that and you're just roommates, no matter how well you get along.
And you definitely don't want to have to break in TWO new stepfamilies, do you?
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